You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story

You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story

Annabelle Gurwitch, Jeff Kahn


during this hilarious and finally relocating memoir, comedians and real-life married couple Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahn turn out that during marriage, all you would like is love—and a hefty dose of complaining, codependence, and pinot noir.
 
After 13 years of being married, Annabelle and Jeff have came across “We’re simply now not that into us.” rather than giving up, they’ve held their courting jointly by way of ignoring traditional knowledge and fostering a scarcity of intimacy, by utilizing parenting as a aggressive game, and by way of dropping by the wayside of treatment. The he-said/she-said chronicle in their excessive yet loving marriage contains an unsentimental account of the scientific odyssey that their kin embarked upon after their baby son was once clinically determined with VACTERL, a truly infrequent sequence of start defects. Annabelle and Jeff’s unforgivingly uncooked, uproariously shaggy dog story is certain to strike either laughter and terror within the hearts of all (not to say each person who's considering the connubial state).
 
Serving up equivalent components sincerity and cynicism, You Say Tomato, I Say close Up is a laugh-out-loud must-read for everybody who has come to gain that being “in love” can basically get you so far.
 
On Cohabitation
He says: “Within days of Annabelle’s arrival, I grew to become very acutely aware that she demanded solitude and had the home tasks conduct of a feral animal.”

She says:
“The man had a few type of nudity radar. whilst i might take my outfits off for even a moment, Jeff will be in entrance of me cheering as though he’d scored field seats at Fenway Park.”
 
On Sex
He says: “I are looking to have intercourse each day, yet Annabelle merely desires to do it as soon as every week. So we compromise: now we have intercourse as soon as a week.”

She says:
“Jeff says conversing approximately cash prior to you may have intercourse is a turnoff, yet it’s just a turnoff if you’re conversing approximately no longer having funds. speaking approximately cash prior to you've intercourse if you have cash is de facto a turn-on.”
 
On Pregnancy
He says: “For God’s sake, all i wished to do used to be have intercourse and not using a condom for a short time; now we have been moments from bringing a brand new lifestyles into the world!”

She says:
“My ass used to be increasing so quick it was once like a Starbucks franchise. On each nook of my ass there has been a brand new department of ass starting up.”

From the Hardcover edition.

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