Two More Pints
males meet for a pint – or – in a Dublin pub. They chunk the fats, set the area to rights, curse the ref, say a final farewell…
In this moment choice of comedian dialogues Doyle’s drinkers ponder:
- a topless Kate Middleton
- Barack and Michelle Obama (‘fuckin’ gorgeous’)
- David Beckham (‘Would you tattoo your kids’ names at the again of your neck?’ ‘They wouldn’t fit’)
- Jimmy Savile (‘a gobshite’)
- the monetary difficulty (again)
- abortion (again)
- and horsemeat on your burger…
Once back, these we've misplaced troop via their suggestions - Lou Reed, Seamus Heaney, Reg Presley, Nelson Mandela (‘he shouldn't ever have left the 4 Tops’), Phil Everly, Margaret Thatcher, Shirley Temple - they usually nonetheless have that unerring skill to invite the relatively basic questions like ‘Would you're taking penalty issues on your missis?’
supply a fuck? — Yeah. — yet can we? — No. — No, we don’t. 14-8-13 — Thirty-five grand. — What approximately it? — It’d purchase yeh loads of gargle. — It fuckin’ may. — Thirty-five thousand cans of Dutch Gold. only for instance. — Fuck – I’m uncertain that’s an enticing proposal annymore. — I’m simply givin’ yeh an easy photograph. an concept of the size o’ the object. — You’re talkin’ in regards to the volume o’ booze tha’ obtained dropped at the Garda station in Belmullet. — In 2007 – yeah. — Who gave it to.
Seamus Heaney died. — observed tha’. unhappy. — Did yeh ever meet him? — Don’t be fuckin’ thick. the place might i've got met Seamus Heaney? — That’s the article, yet. He seemed like anyone yeh’d be aware of. — i do know wha’ yeh suggest – the eyebrows an’ tha’. — He continually gave the impression of he beloved laughin’. — One o’ the men. — apart from the fuckin’ poetry. — Wha’ could own a guy like tha’ to throw his lifestyles away on poetry? — precisely. — even though, reasonable adequate – he received the Nobel Prize for it. — He’d most likely have.
precisely. There’s mad fellas all over yet in the United States they provide them weapons. 4-10-13 — See Stephen Ireland’s granny died. — approximately fuckin’ time. — Jesus, guy. That’s fuckin’ harsh. — Yeah – ok. I’m sorry for her problems. — She’s lifeless. — Grand. An’ it’s unhappy. however it can’t’ve been effortless bein’ that prick’s granny. convinced, he introduced she died – how in the past? — Six years. — Is it six? — Yeah. — the place did they fuckin’ cross? — significant, isn’t it? I can’t even bear in mind now why precisely he stated.
lengthy, it was once. — An’ tha’ was once your year’s paintings, used to be it? — in a single day. It wasn’t there while i used to be brushin’ enamel final nigh’. — Jesus, are your tooth on your ear besides? — Fuck off. It’s growin’ outdated. each fuckin’ day – a piece much less. i will infrequently take into accout the names of me young children. The grandkids are fuckin’ impostors. — yet yeh understand, the worst factor approximately this yr is findin’ out the Yanks are watchin’ us. — now not me an’ you, like. — Yeah. — Why the fuck could they be watchin’ us? Now, like –.
name them boggers. — good, they’ll consistently be culchies in my middle. specially the Kerrymen. — No argument. They’re the easiest culchies of the lot. — I labored with a chap from Kerry. great sufficient fella yet I couldn’t comprehend a fuckin’ note he stated. I’m lovely convinced it wasn’t English. — Irish, might be. — might be, yeah. His sandwiches, righ’? They have been so substantial – he’d carry it to his mouth an’ his entire fuckin’ head may disappear in the back of it. in simple terms his fringe, like – hangin’ over the sting. — See.