Happily Ali After: An Other Fairly True Tales
“Hilarious. . . . Her glass isn’t part full—it’s ‘empty and cracked.’”—Entertainment Weekly (the needs to List)
Moved through a very inspirational tweet someday, Ali Wentworth resolves to stay through the pithy maxims she discovers in her feeds. What starts off as a type of self-help undertaking fast becomes anything some distance grander—and more and more funnier—as the tweets she as soon as considered with irony develop into full of starting to be metaphysical value. And therefore starts off her “Unhappiness Project.”
It’s now not all that lengthy sooner than Ali expands her self-improvement quest to incorporate parenting, relationships, health (or lack thereof), and weight loss program suggestion. the implications are painfully (at occasions actually) transparent: in terms of self-help, occasionally you need to depart it to the professionals.
“Razor-sharp.”—Cosmopolitan“Irresistible. . . . Sharply observant and incisively funny.”—Library Journal
Observations approximately lifeless people who none people might dispute—who is familiar with if one’s great-grandfather regretted his lifestyles? Or if an eighteenth-century aunt overlooked her early life home?—Donna moved directly to Polly. “I see a dog?” Polly nodded. I suggest, likelihood is sooner or later in our lives we now have all stumble upon, owned, or maybe petted a puppy. “A white, fluffy dog.” Polly shook her head. “A medium-size puppy? Black?” Polly shook her head back. when we exhausted the chance of even if the puppy used to be a Jack.
Skinny-dipping in lakes and consuming tempeh wraps made via vegan hippies in Woodstock. And there i used to be, a grown lady (who may by no means enable someone see her bare) eating pork jerky, using up ninety five north to convey her daughter domestic. A daughter who was once now not leaping nude into gleaming lakes, yet hiding less than the infirmary cot with Brandy’s stolen cellphone. I felt previous. And the pneumonia and hassle respiring exacerbated that feeling. I reminisced concerning the long-haired man with a lisp who used to.
related dry fish, so the praise is meaningless—in truth it’s worse than that, it’s humiliating. yet every week later if I make an analogous cod dish, yet with extra lemon and butter and it truly is scrumptious and he says so, the praise capacity extra simply because it’s real. HUSBAND: (Looks at Dr. Love) I don’t, I’m now not . . . this is often the place it will get difficult for me! DR. LOVE: Ali, you look indignant . . . ALI: I’m no longer indignant. And if i'm it’s due to superficial such things as I’m aging, I’m petrified of dying, and.
Forty-nine years outdated. God, that hurts. i need to lie, i actually do. Please, can’t all of us shave off a decade? good, now not you teenagers—unless you must struggle through puberty back? Now, i do know if I have been a Pilgrim i'd already be lifeless (their lifestyles expectancy within the early 1600s was once 40 years old). and i've no cause to think I’ll be taken down via scurvy. So, the glass is part complete, correct? No, the glass is empty and cracked. I’m now not desirous about dwelling until eventually I’m 100 years outdated; in fact,.
treatments for the thinning and no more versatile vagina. Many unappealing phrases have been bandied about—irrational, moody, depressed, exhaustion, weepy, weight achieve, dry dermis, hair loss, and sleeplessness. and that i countered with hackneyed jokes approximately “dry” humor and vaginoplasty. i used to be employed as leisure, now not for my biochemical services, so I did think pressured to be extra Don Rickles than Dr. ounces in the course of the development, despite the fact that, there has been a shift. i began asking real questions on what my.