A parody of the global tv phenomenon Downton Abbey, with cats.
Welcome to Downton Tabby
Here, the aristocrats of the animal nation live in stately beauty, napping, grooming, dozing a few extra, and being fed by way of their downstairs cats, unaware that their approach of life—providing paintings for others—is approximately to be swept away via the tides of background . . . and runaway automobiles.
The fur will fly.
This funny parody offers crucial info for maintaining their Golden Age, together with the right way to maintain a mystery at Downton Tabby, find out how to Argue with Lord Grimalkin approximately His such a lot Deeply Held ideals, and a few Uninvited yet worthwhile phrases from the Dowager.
speedier, feline! Kill! Kill! by means of the Regency period, the entire rigmarole of romance had turn into so refined and complicated that gentlewomen constructed the Language of the Fan—a approach of conversation nonetheless used, in a converted shape, by means of cats this present day. THE LANGUAGE OF THE FAN Drawing the fan around the cheek: “I love you.” Drawing the fan during the hand: “I hate you!” Twirling the fan within the correct hand: “I love another.” swiftly ultimate the fan: “I am jealous.” Fanning fast: “I am engaged.”.
The window at not anything, in order that used to be a very good signal. Then, one excellent morning, he obtained up at the eating room desk, went down on one knee, and passed Minxy a small, eco-friendly velvet field. “This is tiny. How am I speculated to get my head in this?” she requested. “No, you don’t placed your head in it. glance inside.” She opened it. It was once a hoop. “I hoped for bacon. Or a minimum of a moth.” “Will you put on my ring?” “I don’t have fingers.” “We’re going round in circles.” “You’re sitting at the lazy Susan.”.
won't. You: My mind’s made up. Lord Grimalkin: visit your room. girl Korat: expensive . . . Lord Grimalkin: Oh, wonderful. yet I by no means notion I’d see the day. You: The wirehaired terrier has additionally requested me to marry him. Lord Grimalkin: visit your room. girl Korat: expensive . . . Lord Grimalkin: rather well, then. i guess I’m an outdated stick-in-the-mud. you could have my blessing. reliable canine, wirehaireds. Hate rats. we will be able to construct on that. You: Did I say “wirehaired terrier”? I intended “cigarette-smoking chimp.
(Rebeccat) At Sedley Mansion, Rawdon Crawley foolishly married the social-climbing governess, Becky Sharp, and used to be disinherited. (Vanity Fur) And at Norland Park, Mr. Dashwood died unexpectedly, and vague inheritance legislation intended the property went to a far off relative, whereas his 3 daughters have been left to discover husbands. (Stoats and Sensibility) while conflict had damaged out in Europe, it hadn’t been a minute too quickly for Becky Sharp. Her husband and the fellow she enjoyed either went and one among them died.
Kriege, Carl von Clausewitz wrote that during struggle every thing is easy, yet even the best factor is hard. (And there are those that say Germans aren’t funny!) In British excessive society, this rule—the least difficult factor is difficult—was additionally precise approximately getting dressed, taking a stroll, or asking anyone to go the breadsticks. within the morning of the 20th century, the principles of etiquette for the manor born—dictating the delicate nuance of gesture and drawing the skinny line among what was once performed and.